Re: There can be only one

Subject: Re: There can be only one
Date: Mon, 18 Nov 1996 16:45:35 -0800 (PST)
From: Agent Orange
To: Jak Din

Jerk-lad,
Dad wanted me to tell you that since he saw that you could use your ATM mickey to yank some cash outta your wee account, you should use it again today to take that five hundred bones out yourself, instead of having Niles do it and then wire it to you. Or something like that. Anyway, I have to go and whip up some money-making scheme so Father Time doesn't flay me again with his infamous "Shard Lasso." Write back, you plebian germ eater.

Mr. E.

Re: Pids be wary

Subject: Re: Pids be wary
Date: Fri, 15 Nov 1996 00:49:06 -0800 (PST)
From: Agent Orange
To: jakdin@po.iijnet.or.jp

Bro,

Holy scroltoly, Jak, it sounds like your job is a regular humbinga. I just got an e-mail from Kevin, and he said he's put out a bounty on your sorry ass because you haven't contacted him yet. Actually, I sent him a message, asking if he could help me with some financial aide info that might be available from Can'tada. Anyway, just slap his crack and send him some hooey.

The job "hunting" around here hasn't gone so good so far. Honestly, my heart just aint in it. I dunno. I think I'm rockin to get my family up to Vancouver and my butt into the animation studio at VFS. Craig told me he's been floationg in a still pond lately, and really needs to get out and get something more productive done. He said that he and Ken (did you ever meet Ken, that greasy whore?) were thinking about going up to Vancouver and the three of us could go hog wild with some of our ideas. I'm not sure if they're planning to go to VFS or just mess around for a couple of months. Either way, I'm dying to get up there.

Kevin told me that the new Disney studio is looking for about 100 new animators right now, and next year they'll be expanding and looking for about 300 more. Sounds good to me. But if any of my reddest, hottest pipe dreams come to fruition, I'll have a burning hot portfolio in the mail to Skywalker Ranch by the time I'm done "learning." Christ, wouldn't that just be the end of all things? Think about it, Episode One is coming out sometime in '99 (we hope), and the last thing I heard, Lucas decided not to the principal shooting of all three episodes at the some time, but instead to do 'em one at a time, the old fashioned way. Which means when my ass is prime for launching when I "graduate" in '98, there just might be some room for a stupid-ass, Star Wars super freak to get his self down to some gnarly alien designs. Like I said, its a pipe dream... but its mine so shut your goddamn anal pore and let me have it.

We just saw Ransom today, and boy oh fuckin boy was it good. Of course, the hightlight was the trailer for the Special Edition Star Wars ... may the devil throw a bolt of electric lightning in my ditch, man! Some goddamn good stuff. That little trailer cherub is the best thing I've seen on the silver screen since we took in Return of the Jedi way back in '83. Sweet Jesus. The word is that A New Hope starts at the end of January, with the others following each month afterwards. Pretty fuckin A.

Hey, this bitch is even longer than one of Dad's. Have fun in JLand, you lucky bastard.

Live long and pop her

Mr. E

An Intro

Recently I started cleaning out a closet and I found a box of old odds and ends. One thing which caught my searching eyes was a bundle of printouts I had output a long time ago while working/living in Japan. The printouts are all emails sent to me from my brother who was in the States.

I'll be posting 1 mail every few days. It's great to reread all these and laugh my arse off at the way my brother could rattle off a great one-liner, or two- or three-...

As you read, you might not understand much of what he's talking about, but maybe some will get a quick chukle out of it.

ENJOY! :)